The Toilet Who Wouldn’t –An FFing Lesson
A Grandpa story
Sara: David and Techi can you guess what time it is? It’s potty time! Let’s head to the bathrooms, David in the gents room. Ha!
David: What does ‘gents’ mean Auntie Sara?
Sara: It means ‘men’. The gent’s room is the men’s room. The men’s bathroom!
(In the bathroom with Sara and Techi)
Techi: Oh my Auntie Sara I had a very big tinkle, but I’m all finished now.
Sara: Okay Techi lets get rid of those germy germs and wash our hands right away. If we didn’t wash our hands and then touched Daddy’s cup or spoon, we could make him very sick. We wouldn’t want Daddy to get sick would we?
Techi: Oh no!
Sara: Well let’s flush those germs right down the drain then!!
(Techi exits the bathroom)
Sara: Techi WAIT! YOU FORGOT TO FLUSH THE TOILET! What a very big mistake and hygiene risk!
Techi: But Auntie Sara, the toilet won’t flush!
Sara: Oh my goodness gracious! What are we going to do? Dear lord forgive Sue for not double-checking to make sure our ship was operating in tip-top shape this morning. Well I guess we’ll have to ask Daddy and the boys to fix it.
Techi: (In Tears) I’m so sorry Auntie Sara. I tried, and tried but it just won’t flush and I don’t know why.
(Dito Enters bathroom)
Dito: Why is Techi crying Auntie Sara?
Sara: Because the toilet won’t flush. Dito can you be a big boy and run downstairs and call Daddy and James so we can fix it right away?
Dito: Yes ma’am!
(2 minutes later)
Dad: Hi Sara! Hi Techi!
James: Hi girls!
Dad: What seems to be the problem Sara?
Techi: Daddy the toilet won’t flush!
Dad: Oh me oh my! Oh my lord! Oh my goodness gracious! Its almost as if the Devil himself threw a wrench in! David, son, would you run downstairs and get the safety goggles and pliers, we need to fix this right away.
Dito: Yes sir!
(2 minutes later)
Dito: Here Dad, I brought everything you said.
Dad: Thanks son! Did you make sure to hold the railing as you were going up and down the stairs like a good handyman would?
Dito: Yes sir!
Dad: Ah! Here you go James! These safety goggles should fit you perfectly. I’ll slip mine on as well and we’ll get right to work.
Dito: But why do you have to wear safety goggles right now grandpa?
Dad: Every good handyman does son! What if the foundation of the toilet exploded in my face, I could be blinded for life. Would you want your father who loves and cares for u to go around blind?
Dito: No sir!
Sara: Thanks so much for taking the time to do this Dad. It’s such a big help. Poor Techi got pretty worked up about the incident, but now that you’re here she seems to have really calmed down. The other day I actually had to give her a little ‘what-paddy-gave-the-drum’ for forgetting to flush the toilet, but she seems to have really learned her lesson.
Dad: PTL honey you’re an excellent teacher. You know what Techi? This little incident actually reminds me of a story…Sara, would you call Maria up on the intercom and have her bring the Dictaphone please?
Sara: Amen for sure Dad! It’s always great to hear your input.
Dad: Well I’m the King and the servant of one. If I let even one of these golden seeds fall to the ground, my crown would be stripped for not heeding the calling I’ve been given.
James: Wow amen dad!
Sara: Here’s our Queen with a Dictaphone.
Dad: Well hallelujah for Heaven! Every time I see Mama my eyes become misty with tears, seeing her is like a little glimpse of Heaven.
Maria: (Blushing) I love you my BIG papa lion!
Sara: Ha! A little bit of loving!
Dad: Amen glory to god! Will you all be comfortable sitting here in the bathroom? We could all go into the living room, because the talk I’m about to give the whole home should hear! Hell, the whole family should hear it because it’s the King speaking, hallelujah!! James if you don’t mind staying here and fixing the toilet, because I have to go give the home this important talk.
James: Yes sir…(Mumbles) Then I can get some actual tools to fix it, instead of using safety goggles and pliers.
Maria: I’ll get on the interview with Misty and have her let the staff know we’re meeting in the living room right away.
Dad: Thanks honey!
(5 minutes later)
Dad: Hallelujah! Here we are again having a much-needed talk. David could you run to the kitchen and request our cook to bring out some lemonade, I really worked up a sweat fixing that toilet upstairs and I’m quite thirsty.
Dito: Yes sir!
Dad: Now where was I? Ah I actually have a great story about lemonade from my childhood, but I think I may have told you folks that one already. Ha! Mama is the Dictaphone on and ready to record?
Maria: Yes dad! I’ve been recording your golden seeds ever since you called me upstairs.
Dad: Amen that’s wonderful honey! Well just a little while ago Sara called James and me upstairs. It seems that Techi had tinkled during potty time and had tried to flush the toilet, but it wouldn’t flush. Techi got quite worked up about it, because Sara has really instilled good hygiene habits in her, and so she was worried she would get in trouble for not flushing the toilet. And I thought not that’s funny. Our house is always running smoothly. Maybe the Lord is trying to get through to me somehow with this little incident. I thought well everything has been going so good these days, that the Lord is trying to get through to us, reminding us to keep our guards up; And more specifically on the lines of FFing. I’ve really been taking the time to pray about the FFing situation here, and why it hasn’t been as fruitful as when we first started out. I thought I myself “why Lord”? This is Davidito’s homeland; the Guan Chan tribes are here. Why would we be having problems here where the Queen conceived her firstborn? And then as I was standing there with Techi it all came to me, and the Lord shouted it out to me.
Sara: This really goes to prove that verse “out of the mouths of babes and suckling”…
Dad: Amen hallelujah! Just like the toilet wouldn’t flush for Techi, it reminded me of the time good little Susie Baker wouldn’t kiss me. I was just a boy maybe 7 or 8 years old. My mother knew the Bakers from church, and we would often go to their house for tea. And one time little Susie and me were alone in the room. I was a young boy and my hormones were just about exploding every time I was around one of those cute little girls with their tight frocks and frill skirts. And I leaned over and held Susie’s mouth, and tried to plant a big kiss on her cheek. But she got scared! I guess parents in the system just don’t teach their children about freedom in the spirit, and heavenly lovemaking. And little Susie said, “What are you doing? I won’t kiss you. You did a terrible thing, don’t ever do it again or I’ll tell my mother.” Boy Susie scared the hell right out of me! I didn’t want her telling my mother or her mother that I had forcibly tried to kiss her. But lo and behold, I did try again. I went out with Susie and bought her an ice cream, and in return she actually kissed me on the cheek, but I think it was her way of saying thank you. Poor Techi tried, had tried to get the toilet to flush, but it wouldn’t. But when she called in James and me, with a little tweaking, elbow grease, and lots of love and compassion we were able to fix it. Like with Susie, when I forcibly tried to kiss her, she wouldn’t have it. But when I took her out for that ice cream and showed her some real love, she gladly kissed me. And that’s what the Lord was trying to tell me about our FFing ministry here. We can’t try to hard. We can’t almost literally force these little washed out businessmen to receive the love of God through our girls. We have to show them love and compassion first, and then is when we really get deep both spiritually and physically with them. Do you folks understand what I’m getting at here? Do you big teens really get the concept of what I’m trying to tell you?
Fam: Amen! This is a very sobering lesson Dad!
Dad: Hallelujah for heaven! And look, here’s Gem our cook with the fresh lemonade just in time. Thanks honey!
Gem: I made it just for you Dad!
(Kisses and hugs Dad)
Dad: Oh my well that was a long and inspiring talk, another wonderful Mo Letter we can send out to the fields, and the highways and byways. But here I am, praying and asking the Lord what he wants this new fresh wisdom to be called?
Maria: Well maybe it could be called “The Girl who wouldn’t”, because Susie wouldn’t break free to show you love.
Sara: Or maybe it should be called “the toilet who wouldn’t”, because the toilet wouldn’t flush for Techi. But even though the Devil really got in our home and tried to disrupt us and cause discord through that broken toilet, you were still able to get very heavenly and inspired visions and wisdom from it, that can help the FFing ministry here in Tenerife, but also worldwide so thousands more will come to know Him.
Dad: Amen! (Tongues and Weeping) Oh come out, come out ye harvesters for you Father David has spoken. King David has unlocked the doors and opened the barns, and now the sheep and the harvest can be brought in for the Master’s glory. Oh come out all ye with scythes, and reap these fields. Oh lord allow the toilets to keep on flushing until the end. We need them to flush Lord, hallelujah! Hadididbanka Spankadispanka FlushyWushy Hadahadahadahadahada
Maria: Wow Dad those tongues were very strong! One of the seven spirit helpers I have whispered in my ear and said that you were speaking in the Tenerifan dialect of the ancients.
Dad: Amen honey that’s what it was! Is Techi okay now Sara? Has she stopped crying?
Sara: Yes sir!
Dad: PTL! It’s funny how the Lord somehow uses these little seemingly irrelevant situations to my glory, and just shines through me with some stark, new, radical revelation! I guess we should probably close up shop now, and head back to our important duties.
Fam: Amen, Yes sir!
Dad: Techi honey would you like to lead everyone in prayer?
Techi: Dear Jesus thank you for this time with Grandpa. Please help the toilet to be able to flush so it doesn’t get broken, in Jesus name amen.
Dad: Amen honey! What a powerful prayer!! Are you like the toilet who wouldn’t?? I sure hope not! May God bless and keep you! I love you
Your Roaring Lion
A Grandpa story
Sara: David and Techi can you guess what time it is? It’s potty time! Let’s head to the bathrooms, David in the gents room. Ha!
David: What does ‘gents’ mean Auntie Sara?
Sara: It means ‘men’. The gent’s room is the men’s room. The men’s bathroom!
(In the bathroom with Sara and Techi)
Techi: Oh my Auntie Sara I had a very big tinkle, but I’m all finished now.
Sara: Okay Techi lets get rid of those germy germs and wash our hands right away. If we didn’t wash our hands and then touched Daddy’s cup or spoon, we could make him very sick. We wouldn’t want Daddy to get sick would we?
Techi: Oh no!
Sara: Well let’s flush those germs right down the drain then!!
(Techi exits the bathroom)
Sara: Techi WAIT! YOU FORGOT TO FLUSH THE TOILET! What a very big mistake and hygiene risk!
Techi: But Auntie Sara, the toilet won’t flush!
Sara: Oh my goodness gracious! What are we going to do? Dear lord forgive Sue for not double-checking to make sure our ship was operating in tip-top shape this morning. Well I guess we’ll have to ask Daddy and the boys to fix it.
Techi: (In Tears) I’m so sorry Auntie Sara. I tried, and tried but it just won’t flush and I don’t know why.
(Dito Enters bathroom)
Dito: Why is Techi crying Auntie Sara?
Sara: Because the toilet won’t flush. Dito can you be a big boy and run downstairs and call Daddy and James so we can fix it right away?
Dito: Yes ma’am!
(2 minutes later)
Dad: Hi Sara! Hi Techi!
James: Hi girls!
Dad: What seems to be the problem Sara?
Techi: Daddy the toilet won’t flush!
Dad: Oh me oh my! Oh my lord! Oh my goodness gracious! Its almost as if the Devil himself threw a wrench in! David, son, would you run downstairs and get the safety goggles and pliers, we need to fix this right away.
Dito: Yes sir!
(2 minutes later)
Dito: Here Dad, I brought everything you said.
Dad: Thanks son! Did you make sure to hold the railing as you were going up and down the stairs like a good handyman would?
Dito: Yes sir!
Dad: Ah! Here you go James! These safety goggles should fit you perfectly. I’ll slip mine on as well and we’ll get right to work.
Dito: But why do you have to wear safety goggles right now grandpa?
Dad: Every good handyman does son! What if the foundation of the toilet exploded in my face, I could be blinded for life. Would you want your father who loves and cares for u to go around blind?
Dito: No sir!
Sara: Thanks so much for taking the time to do this Dad. It’s such a big help. Poor Techi got pretty worked up about the incident, but now that you’re here she seems to have really calmed down. The other day I actually had to give her a little ‘what-paddy-gave-the-drum’ for forgetting to flush the toilet, but she seems to have really learned her lesson.
Dad: PTL honey you’re an excellent teacher. You know what Techi? This little incident actually reminds me of a story…Sara, would you call Maria up on the intercom and have her bring the Dictaphone please?
Sara: Amen for sure Dad! It’s always great to hear your input.
Dad: Well I’m the King and the servant of one. If I let even one of these golden seeds fall to the ground, my crown would be stripped for not heeding the calling I’ve been given.
James: Wow amen dad!
Sara: Here’s our Queen with a Dictaphone.
Dad: Well hallelujah for Heaven! Every time I see Mama my eyes become misty with tears, seeing her is like a little glimpse of Heaven.
Maria: (Blushing) I love you my BIG papa lion!
Sara: Ha! A little bit of loving!
Dad: Amen glory to god! Will you all be comfortable sitting here in the bathroom? We could all go into the living room, because the talk I’m about to give the whole home should hear! Hell, the whole family should hear it because it’s the King speaking, hallelujah!! James if you don’t mind staying here and fixing the toilet, because I have to go give the home this important talk.
James: Yes sir…(Mumbles) Then I can get some actual tools to fix it, instead of using safety goggles and pliers.
Maria: I’ll get on the interview with Misty and have her let the staff know we’re meeting in the living room right away.
Dad: Thanks honey!
(5 minutes later)
Dad: Hallelujah! Here we are again having a much-needed talk. David could you run to the kitchen and request our cook to bring out some lemonade, I really worked up a sweat fixing that toilet upstairs and I’m quite thirsty.
Dito: Yes sir!
Dad: Now where was I? Ah I actually have a great story about lemonade from my childhood, but I think I may have told you folks that one already. Ha! Mama is the Dictaphone on and ready to record?
Maria: Yes dad! I’ve been recording your golden seeds ever since you called me upstairs.
Dad: Amen that’s wonderful honey! Well just a little while ago Sara called James and me upstairs. It seems that Techi had tinkled during potty time and had tried to flush the toilet, but it wouldn’t flush. Techi got quite worked up about it, because Sara has really instilled good hygiene habits in her, and so she was worried she would get in trouble for not flushing the toilet. And I thought not that’s funny. Our house is always running smoothly. Maybe the Lord is trying to get through to me somehow with this little incident. I thought well everything has been going so good these days, that the Lord is trying to get through to us, reminding us to keep our guards up; And more specifically on the lines of FFing. I’ve really been taking the time to pray about the FFing situation here, and why it hasn’t been as fruitful as when we first started out. I thought I myself “why Lord”? This is Davidito’s homeland; the Guan Chan tribes are here. Why would we be having problems here where the Queen conceived her firstborn? And then as I was standing there with Techi it all came to me, and the Lord shouted it out to me.
Sara: This really goes to prove that verse “out of the mouths of babes and suckling”…
Dad: Amen hallelujah! Just like the toilet wouldn’t flush for Techi, it reminded me of the time good little Susie Baker wouldn’t kiss me. I was just a boy maybe 7 or 8 years old. My mother knew the Bakers from church, and we would often go to their house for tea. And one time little Susie and me were alone in the room. I was a young boy and my hormones were just about exploding every time I was around one of those cute little girls with their tight frocks and frill skirts. And I leaned over and held Susie’s mouth, and tried to plant a big kiss on her cheek. But she got scared! I guess parents in the system just don’t teach their children about freedom in the spirit, and heavenly lovemaking. And little Susie said, “What are you doing? I won’t kiss you. You did a terrible thing, don’t ever do it again or I’ll tell my mother.” Boy Susie scared the hell right out of me! I didn’t want her telling my mother or her mother that I had forcibly tried to kiss her. But lo and behold, I did try again. I went out with Susie and bought her an ice cream, and in return she actually kissed me on the cheek, but I think it was her way of saying thank you. Poor Techi tried, had tried to get the toilet to flush, but it wouldn’t. But when she called in James and me, with a little tweaking, elbow grease, and lots of love and compassion we were able to fix it. Like with Susie, when I forcibly tried to kiss her, she wouldn’t have it. But when I took her out for that ice cream and showed her some real love, she gladly kissed me. And that’s what the Lord was trying to tell me about our FFing ministry here. We can’t try to hard. We can’t almost literally force these little washed out businessmen to receive the love of God through our girls. We have to show them love and compassion first, and then is when we really get deep both spiritually and physically with them. Do you folks understand what I’m getting at here? Do you big teens really get the concept of what I’m trying to tell you?
Fam: Amen! This is a very sobering lesson Dad!
Dad: Hallelujah for heaven! And look, here’s Gem our cook with the fresh lemonade just in time. Thanks honey!
Gem: I made it just for you Dad!
(Kisses and hugs Dad)
Dad: Oh my well that was a long and inspiring talk, another wonderful Mo Letter we can send out to the fields, and the highways and byways. But here I am, praying and asking the Lord what he wants this new fresh wisdom to be called?
Maria: Well maybe it could be called “The Girl who wouldn’t”, because Susie wouldn’t break free to show you love.
Sara: Or maybe it should be called “the toilet who wouldn’t”, because the toilet wouldn’t flush for Techi. But even though the Devil really got in our home and tried to disrupt us and cause discord through that broken toilet, you were still able to get very heavenly and inspired visions and wisdom from it, that can help the FFing ministry here in Tenerife, but also worldwide so thousands more will come to know Him.
Dad: Amen! (Tongues and Weeping) Oh come out, come out ye harvesters for you Father David has spoken. King David has unlocked the doors and opened the barns, and now the sheep and the harvest can be brought in for the Master’s glory. Oh come out all ye with scythes, and reap these fields. Oh lord allow the toilets to keep on flushing until the end. We need them to flush Lord, hallelujah! Hadididbanka Spankadispanka FlushyWushy Hadahadahadahadahada
Maria: Wow Dad those tongues were very strong! One of the seven spirit helpers I have whispered in my ear and said that you were speaking in the Tenerifan dialect of the ancients.
Dad: Amen honey that’s what it was! Is Techi okay now Sara? Has she stopped crying?
Sara: Yes sir!
Dad: PTL! It’s funny how the Lord somehow uses these little seemingly irrelevant situations to my glory, and just shines through me with some stark, new, radical revelation! I guess we should probably close up shop now, and head back to our important duties.
Fam: Amen, Yes sir!
Dad: Techi honey would you like to lead everyone in prayer?
Techi: Dear Jesus thank you for this time with Grandpa. Please help the toilet to be able to flush so it doesn’t get broken, in Jesus name amen.
Dad: Amen honey! What a powerful prayer!! Are you like the toilet who wouldn’t?? I sure hope not! May God bless and keep you! I love you
Your Roaring Lion
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